It is time for THE NEWLYWED GAME.
Typically I do not join these linkups just because there are SO MANY out there. If I sat down and wrote a post for all the linkups then I would be putting off A LOT of homework and other real life related things. But... last night was a different story. Since we are celebrating 8 months of marriage on Saturday I thought "go for it" and did!
My sweet blogger friend, Veronica @ Passion, Pink, and Pearls sent me an email. I actually have been super busy during the days this week so I have not had the chance to join in on all the blog fun to meet new bloggers. So, I figured this linkup was the one for me for this particular week! You may remember Veronica from the awesome Potato Chowder recipe she shared on my blog last week.
Veronica, as well as Karla @ Forever Newlywedded are hosting this link up. Feel free to copy and paste the questions below, follow these awesome ladies and their blogs, and join in on all the Newlywed fun. :)
1. Who does the laundry in your home, you or your spouse? Any good stories?
- Typically I do the majority of the laundry in our home. Every now and again Tony will help me without me having to ask him.
- Of course I have a funny story. What is not funny about marriage in newlywed land? If you have read my blog often, you know that I preach on the topic: Marriage is not a contract. Marriage is a commitment. Should I repeat this again? Many of our family members (on both sides) see marriage as a contract and it is extremely disheartening because they do not understand why we do things the way we do/feel the way we do about marriage. You will find many similar funny stories and reasons why we believe marriage is a commitment in my Confessions [Life As A New Wife] posts.
- Here's my semi funny story: When Tony leaves that pack of gum in his pants HE has to figure out a way to get the entire pack of gum out of our brand new dryer AND out of our clothes. Although I love him, I will not always clean up his messes because he will never learn anything. Yes, that would be a spatula he is using to scrap gum out of our dryer. Praise the Lord for Google step by step tutorials. Obviously he was not the first husband to make this mistake.Thankfully, we did not have to replace many items that were in this particular load of clothes.
2. If your spouse had to eat at one restaurant for the rest of their lives, what would he or she pick?
- Tony would choose to eat at Buffalo Wild Wings for every single meal if he could. Don't get me wrong, I love the place. Their mild sauce covered naked tenders and BBQ bacon sandwich are to die for amazing. the prices are even legit too. However, I do not love the place enough to eat at it every single day. Plus, it does not always love me.
3. Are you or your spouse better at cooking? Any good stories?
- I am definitely better at cooking than Tony. I am certainly not top chef material. I am slowly learning new tips and tricks of the trade. He barely knows how to use the oven. I will say, Tony is learning to cook a mean frozen pizza and waffles though.
- He loves when I cook but I truly think he just likes to eat it with me, not cook it with me. Dinner is one of the only times that we have to sit down together and talk so it is always nice to be together then. I am trying to teach him to enjoy being in the kitchen. Currently my efforts are hopeless. Possibly, when we have a larger kitchen he will be more prone to spending time with me learning to cook.
4. Which one of you is more concerned about their "fashion"?
- I definitely am more concerned about my "fashion" than Tony. Now that we have to attend big kid events more frequently he is learning that he cannot wear only jeans, a t-shirt, and Nike's. He is slowly becoming more in tune with the appropriate attire depending upon where we are going or what the event calls for. I have to dress nice pretty much every day of the week, which I do not mind at all. I must add, I love him no matter what he wears. Some of our favorite days are pajama days and sweats days. Those are such comfy, fun loving days!
5. Ideally, if you don't have them already, when does you spouse want to have children?
- As most of you already know, I have no plans for children in the near future. (I discussed this topic more in depth in #4 of THIS POST). Tony wants to have children earlier in life because he would like to retire young. He is two years older than me, has completed a Bachelor degree, and has no plans to obtain a Master degree. I certainly do not blame him one bit! He does not need the additional degree and believes there is no reason to waste time for something he truly does not desire.
- I still have to finish my Bachelor and Master degrees. I want to be able to enjoy my profession before I get lost in being a mother. I want to enjoy coming home to my husband in the evenings and cooking dinner for two, not three or four. Plus, I do not want to rush into parenthood. Being a parent takes a lot of work, time, and sacrifices. I gladly allow my husband to consume each of those areas of my life (as well as school). One day when the time is right, we will venture down the parenthood road. I believe the Lord has so much more in store for the here and now for us.
6. Who planned dates when you were dating? And what was one of your favorites?
- We would both plan dates when we dated. Tony and I started dating when I was in 9th grade and he was in 11th grade. He had a vehicle and could drive. At the time, I did not have a car nor could I drive. I was not allowed to "ride around" with anyone, let alone a boy until I was in 10th grade. We eventually started "dating" when he was a senior and I was a sophomore. Typically we would go to Outback for dinner and then a movie. This was the basic ritual once he went to college at The University of Alabama and even after I moved to Baton Rouge to attend LSU. Only then, our driving distance to each other was much longer.
7. What's been the toughest part of being a newlywed?
- Asking him for his help is a biggy. During the first few months of marriage I would get so frustrated that he simply played video games all the time. As a female, I saw things that needed to be done and so I would just go do it. He, on the other hand will let dishes sit in the sick all.week.long. It drives me insane! Tony will not do something chore-wise until he runs out whatever it is he needs (be it clean dishes, towels, etc.).
- I wish I did not have to tell him what needs to be done because I feel as though I only handicap him. I feel as though he should have learned how to make a house a home and I should not have to teach him the smallest of things all over again. But it is then though that I realize- This is his first rodeo as a Husband. Comparing this semester to last semester, I am away from home more than ever because of school, organizations, and placement obligations. He has had to take on more responsibility lately and he has done really well without me here all the time. I must say, I am so proud of him and am thankful to have such a support Husband to come home to in the evenings no matter what was done chore-wise. It is just nice that we finally live in the same zip code again.
8. Who is the best with the finances?
- I would have to say that this is a half and half job for us. I get the mail and make sure the bills are paid on time. Tony budgets the checkbook and makes sure there is money available for bills, groceries, entertainment, or activities. I actually just posted on how we budget, what we use to keep track of things, and other tips in this post: Organize To Thrive. Actually, I had to learn how to budget and keep track of finances fairly young in life. Tony is the math man. He is extremely smart and even minored in math in college. When you put us together, you get a super frugal and obsessive budgeting couple. We think through and research every single purchase before it is comes out of the bank account. When you have to work and pay for things on your own, you learn to buy after you have exhausted all resources.
9. Who is the strict one?
- When it comes to certain things, Tony can be strict. Also, I can be strict. It honestly all depends on what the topic is at the time and our present decision on the subject matter. When given any situation, I can go ahead and tell you exactly what he would think or say before asking him. He can also do the same for me. Through the past 8 years we have learned how to not push one another's buttons, yet also respect their opinion if we disagree. I know not to cross his boundaries and he knows the same for me. There should always be a happy medium, not perfection. Perfection is totally overrated.
10. What will you plan to do for your first anniversary? Or if you've already celebrated your first anniversary, what did you do?
- We have been discussing this new, upcoming "milestone" for a couple of months. We have a few ideas that we are playing with but we have not come to the point of a decision yet. Since I will be in school during the summer we will not have ample time away from home. We are not too excited to pay great strides for an expensive trip that will be short and fast pace. Do you have any ideas, readers? I would love to hear your thoughts.
I hope you enjoyed reading a little snippet from our newlywed world. We are learning and growing so much these days! As I have said before, I truly believe marriage is the best blessing and challenge the Lord can bestow upon a dating couple ready to tackle the next chapter in life and love. Although Tony and I thought we knew everything about each other before starting our marriage, I can say we have learned so much about each other and about ourselves in the past few months. Living together does not change who you are or what you represent as a couple, but it does change how you work together and support each other during different situations. Every single day he is there for me in so many ways, and I cannot even begin to describe how awesome it is to be with each other day in and day out. Being married definitely beats a long distance relationship any day.
I absolutely adore my Husband. He has a precious heart and is compassionate, smart, funny, and so handsome! It is truly remarkable to think of how far we have grown in the past seven or so years. However, it is even more awesome that the Lord knows Tony and me better than we know each other or ourselves. Jesus knew that Tony and I would become marriage partners even when we did not. During a devotion called Every Young Woman's Battle I began to think about dating and what would be associated. With the thoughts of dating running wild in my mind, of course marriage follows. During the devotion I also read I Kissed Dating Goodbye and And The Bride Wore White which encourages young christian girls to pray for their future spouse. From then on, my devotion leader at the time, Jaime @ Faith, Hope, and The Love's challenged me to only date guys that I could see myself marrying. I can remember making a list and praying for my future Husband every day. I even prayed for my future Husband throughout my high school relationship with Tony not knowing that he and I would make this far. It is not that I did not trust our relationship, I honestly just thought it was another spell of high school love. It is almost crazy to think about how much the Lord has impacted our relationship over time, but He has known exactly what He was doing from day one in 2003. The Lord is committed through the ups and the downs! I cannot imagine life without my precious Husband. I certainly cannot even imagine life and love without the Lord leading my path, and for that I am so thankful. From one blessing to another, the Lord continues to provide and I look forward to sharing the next 80 years with Tony Harper tackling the ups and downs of life and love.
I thank my God every time I remember you. -Philippians 1:3
As always, until next time- Happy Blogging!
PS- I also posted Friday Letters HERE.